New Zealand 2

The journey continues and I now need to introduce my two new chums, Frank and Betty. Frank is the official big mike transportation system!! I am not prone to anthropomorphisation  (a great word for naming and giving human characteristics to animals or inanimate objects), but spending so much time alone in the car, I thought I would name him so as to enable me to vent spleen on a ‘personal’ level from time to time.

The rather jolly Indian lady at the hire company reluctantly handed over his keys as if she was passing  the lead of her favourite spotty puppy to an employee of Cruella DeVil, a little over the top considering Frank is a 12 year old, battle weary, 1500cc, automatic ,Toyota Platz – a what I hear you say, as did I – but that was the best deal in automotive hire history according to Mrs ‘Madras’, and it was actually much better than some of the tugs I was offered.

 He is best described as a rather unfit relation of the naughty locomotive on Thomas the Tank Engine He occasionally changes gear on his own, either up or down, refuses to accelerate properly when required, most embarrassing when trying to overtake a ¼ of a mile logging wagon, runs out of puff at the sight of any sort of incline and makes his own mind up when and for how many doors the central locking will apply. For all that, it makes the driving a bit more exciting than Mr Reliable Saab back home, and to be fair, a vehicle I thought would be unlikely to get out of the company compound has performed brilliantly for my tour around a considerable proportion of the top half of the country and I have no reservations that he will be up to the challenge from now on.

Betty is a different proposition. Hers’ is the voice that emanates from the accompanying satellite navigation system. She has a broad New Zealand accent that I think probably belonged to the wife of a deaf miner from  middle Earth.

 Unfortunately Betty hasn’t been updated in at least 5 years and has not realised that an extensive improvement and rerouting of many of the national highways has been undertaken, and, therefore, despite being on the correct road, she insists on yelling at me to ‘perform a U turn as soon as possible’ with infuriating regularity, causing me to engage in a colourful explanation that I am on the right road. Eventually, she shuts up, tells me she is re-calculating and then re routes me, onto the same road, but with an attitude that suggests that she was right all along, then calm returns for another 20 minutes or so. ....... oh, the joys of travelling !!

My pre arrival impression of New Zealand was a bit vague. ‘A bit like Wales’ was probably the most quoted description. Well  .....  where do I start? .......  the most striking thing is that, apart from, the main cities/towns,  there are only 26 people that live here, and most of those seem to only come out at night. This is certainly the impression you get. I have driven many hundreds of miles and have only seen a handful of people in the countryside, two of which were European hitch hikers, and there is one hell of a lot of countryside here.

 Hour after hour I have passed empty, mainly brown fields, just meadows, very few crops until I reached the Hawks Bay area, very rarely do you see cows or sheep, OK they are having some problems with reportedly the worst drought in many years, the effect of which has been to turn the fields brown, but where is all the livestock? Where is the New Zealand lamb, Anchor butter cows etc??  It really is quite amazing how much empty space there is.

 Geographically it is awesome, and bear in mind this is North Island, which Kiwis regard as bland compared to the south, but even here there are mountain ranges with peaks higher than anything in UK covering over 20% of the land mass and three volcanic peaks over 2,000 metres,  a sensational and dramatic coastline with countless coves, beaches, off shore stacks and islands mostly set in a blue/green sea, huge tracts of forests both natural and native and vast prairie like pasture land plus a couple of pretty substantial lakes and a very active geothermal scene, and it changes seemingly every twenty minutes.

Getting around is easy, they drive on the left, they have good signage and, although the roads are almost all single carriageway and mostly unlit, many are arrow straight for miles and they are in great condition. They have very few speed cameras (I ve only seen 4 so far) and even Frank can rattle along at the speed limit (100 kph), or more when he feels like, without any problems, for hours.....but.......when you get into the mountains, the driving becomes phenomenal.

On the main highways reduce your speed warning signs are common, but usually can be treated lightly, in the mountains ignore them at your peril, as few of the bends have barriers and 40kph on a 25kph bend, with a 1,000 + foot drop to the sea, will most definitely be something you only do once!!. Twenty minute ascents or descents are common with countless hairpins and ridiculous adverse cambers, but it is amazing fun .

Most of my time since leaving Auckland has been spent towards the Pacific east cost with stays in the Bay of Islands, Coromandel Peninsular, Rotorua, Napier and finally, a change, on the south western tip, Wellington.

Everywhere is spotlessly clean and in my experience the people are, almost without exception, relaxed, chatty and rugby mad. Prices are pretty similar to back home, although beer is a bit more expensive  -  beer averages at about £4.50 a pint, but a small bottle of SA will set you back £8!!

The weather has been 99% fantastic, considering it is now moving into winter, and clearly a stark contrast to UK at the moment, it is easy to see why I have met so many Brits who choose to overwinter down here rather than stay home as living expenses are similar and the cost of heating your home for 3 months will more than cover the airfare.

New Zealand has only been in existence since 1840 when the Treaty of Waitangi ensured that the British ripped off the Maori for their land and started promoting settlement here. Consequently it has very little history other than the Maori culture, especially compared to what I’ve just had seen in Sri Lanka, and a big issue is made of some  pretty insignificant things – the oldest petrol station in New Zealand for example, so the main attractions are natural and they have heaps of them.

As before, I do not intend to type a guide book, so do your own research if the areas mentioned are interesting, but briefly :-

Bay Of  Islands  -  of huge historical importance because of the Treaty and the Treaty Grounds museum is a brilliant 1/2 day out

 I stayed in Russell, formerly the ‘hell hole of the pacific’ cos the original capital was set up across the other side of a small estuary in Okiato, and Russell was where everyone came to let their hair down, but now it is a very well to do resort, but where everyone goes to bed before 10 pm!!

 Some good fishing here, as evidenced by the stuffed exhibits, including marlin and tuna, that adorn the walls of the Swordfish Club I decided to rekindle my school boy  interest and managed 5 snapper off the pier.

The islands themselves are very pretty and have homes and boats for the rich and famous including (allegedly) several Russian oil billionaires, Tom Cruise, Richard Branson and Dame Kiri Tekanawa .

The natural beauty of the area, the worlds biggest canoe, an 85 seater, and New Zealands biggest tree, a 2000+ year old Kauri, of huge Maori significance, are the things that really stick in my mind about this area, apart from some guys I met. 

A big thank you to Ange and Don, my hosts at the Family Park, Russell, and a big hoorah to  Jim, Anne & kids for a great few days and not forgetting Pete from Leeds, my neighbour across between John Motson and Carl Pilkington !!

I stayed a week to recharge after Sri Lanka, I could have stayed a month but feared that I would have to start drinking cocoa and learn how to knit just to fit in

Coromandel Peninsular - is a much lauded area of north island. Essentially it is a sea hugging road up the west coast to Coramandel town, a cross over the mountain to the top of the east coast, a couple of celebrated beaches and a long trek back down the east coast.

The weather on the day that I tackled the peninsular was not that good and although the west coast road was fab, literally yards from the sea, twisting and turning for about 20 miles, when I crossed over the top, the views were not great and the wind was howling.

On the shoulder of the east coast are Cathedral Cove and Hahei beach, so called legendary beaches (??) which are best accessed by kayak and renowned for the scuba diving. The weather was still not great and the sea swell was huge so I moved on.

The whole  experience I  found a bit disappointing - hey we've got the Gower  -  so I didn t hang about too long heading instead for Rotorua, although this was a 3 hour drive.

Rotorua – a pleasant enough place but for me it was spoiled by the ever present smell of rotten eggs. This is a thermal centre with lots of boiling springs and sulphur laden smoke belching from the ground.

 The city museum was formerly a health centre where people used to visit to take baths in the mineral rich water and soak in mud.

 

 

 Having taken a thermal bath in dirty looking stinky water I spent the next 2 days trying to get the smell out of my system.

Box ticked, no need to repeat that one ...  move on. The only real big plus for me was that I was able to watch a full re run of the Wales v England game  .......  oh yes, looks like a hat full of Lions to me

Napier – Self titled as the art deco capital of the world, it is a small city nestling in the middle of Hawks Bay, the one area that is covered in vegetable, fruit and wine cultivation.

 I decided on a home stay here and was able to find a b&b in the home of a German couple, Kurt & Charlotte. They have an incredible house up a ridiculously steep drive, followed by 2 staircases, that seems to float on the treetops but is so peaceful.

A lot of the local architecture has been retained since the town was totally rebuilt following a devastating earthquake, and resulting fires, that struck in 1931 and I found it quaint and very relaxed a bit like Bournemouth before the stag & hen parties.

 

Wellington – the quite rightly named ‘windy city’ was given quite a big build up on my way down the North Island,  most people regarded it as the place to be and, rightly so, I loved ‘Welly’.

An impressive waterfront, a vibrant arts scene and a super impressive national museum ticked the cultural boxes.
I took the cable car to the top of the overlooking Mt Victoria and then walked the several miles back to the waterfront via the botanical gardens for the exercise, the views and to keep me out of the pub !! The city has more cafe/bars that New York!! and has been dubbed New Zealands ‘ ‘capital of cool’ and its not hard to see why as the place is absolutely bumping.

 There are a huge number of restaurants that all seem full early on but it really comes alive from about 11.30 and keeps going until  5 or 6 in the morning, but I didn’t see one indication of any trouble and not even a policeman!!!!

 Unfortunately it also has a Welsh bar, which was rather limiting for me, as I found it on the first night and didn t really move away from it. Mike & Jo, the owners were great, Jo had done her teachers training in my school, Llanishen High, and we reminisced about some of the old staff which was not what I had expected on the other side of the world , but the real stars were a couple of the locals and bar staff. Cheers to Andy, Chris, Enda, Scotty, Big Bri and Tom.

After 4 nights with a great bunch of guys I retired as champion of drinking, lawn bowls, darts, jenga and pool and also won one of the town poker tournaments, $250 thank you very much

What a great advert ......  come to New Zealand for extreme sports !!!

 

South Island next ......  bring it on....